Well, that was fun.

This is really hard for me to do, but I need to do it so that later on this week when I most likely see the scales tip over, I know why. I cannot make any excuses, I just have to put it all out there and accept it and move on. Here goes:

Friday night: I ended up going out with Joey and Brittany to Applebee’s. My plan was to eat one of their Weight Watchers menu items. But I ended up going for the Black and Bleu burger with fries, chips and salsa, one mozzarella stick, and a Bloody Mary. First of all, what the fack?!? I don’t even LIKE BLEU CHEESE. I HAVE NEVER IN MY LIFE thought that a bleu cheese burger would taste anywhere near good. These are some of the things I’ve learned on my weight loss journey. My taste buds are working against me. Before WW, I HATED cake, especially birthday cake, and now all of a sudden I crave it nonstop. Now this? Ugh. It’s like my body just wants me to fuck up. Anyway, after that little fiasco, I vowed to do better the rest of the weekend.

FAT chance. Saturday: I actually did really well all day Saturday, and I even went running with my sister in law. I had a smart ones for lunch, a salad for dinner, and went to Joey’s football game (which they WON btw! WOO HOO go Delco Cowboys!). Then I headed to Joey’s show, where I also vowed NOT to drink. But I did. First it was a vodka redbull, then a vodka sprite and grenadine, then another, then some crazy drink that I ended up not even finishing because I was way too hammered by this point. I’m a total 2 pounder, I know. While inebriated I decided that a diner would be a nice place to eat. I ended up ordering french onion soup, pancakes, spicy hot sausage, and sausage gravy and biscuits. UGH. I ate like 1/4 of the sausage, maybe one pancake, the 2 biscuits with gravy, and all of the soup. After that, I went home and passed the fug out.

Sunday: My day started out with a SPLITTING headache, and I laid around for a decent part of the day. Around 2 I headed to my parents and hung out with my mom. Where I proceeded to eat about half a bag of spicy doritos, 2 biscuits, some goldfish, a plate of spaghetti, and a pickle. Then I got home and about 2 hours later I was ready for some steak and corn on the cob. THEN I had some cool whip with graham cracker crumbs (albeit was FAT FREE cool whip, but whatevs)

Today: Thank God for work. I was absolutely dreading it, but it is the one thing that keeps me in line. While at work I constantly fill up this Copco® Eco-First Sierra Tumbler which is about 24 fl oz, with water, and drink it all day (I also pee all day). I always have a smart ones for lunch, and my snacks consist of nutri grain bars, park skim cheese sticks, and fruit. (I’m a full time nanny, and the people I work for are pretty good in the healthy food department so I don’t have too many temptations when I’m here). Joey usually cooks dinner on the nights I work, and he always cooks healthy. I just wish that my weekends were as predictable. I tell myself over and over that I’m going to eat right and I’m going to be okay, and I usually end up falling off of that path and going my own way. I’m really disappointed in myself because even on vacation I was better than I was this weekend.

I plan on hitting up the gym or at least running in the neighborhood when I get home tonight, and continuing my day as normal tomorrow. I do have off tomorrow, however I will just be hanging around at home. For whatever reason, during the week no matter what I do well. The weekend comes and I just go bonkers. Why?

I’m stressed about weigh in on Wednesday, but hopefully I can pull it off and just vow to do better this weekend. We have a memorial day weekend trip planned in Dewey at the end of this month and I’m really hoping to be under 200 by then. That’s 7.8 more pounds a way, and I just need to keep that in mind.

Heres to lots of water, smart ones, and running!

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