A Little More Than Half Way Through Week 1 of Skinny Snowman Challenge

I really cannot express how much I am thankful for the Skinny Snowman Challenge from Brooke: Not on a Diet!
 I am on the 5th Day of the challenge and I feel incredible. It’s been challenging me to drink my water, get in lots of fruits and veggies (far more than I usually do), track my food (something I haven’t done in weeks) and really just be back on the WW game. I was SLOWLY sort of slipping away from the plan, but this challenge got me back on.

Here are some of the new recipes I’ve made this week:

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Slow Cooker Cabbage Roll. I found this on http://www.yummly.com

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Roasted Autumn Vegetable Toss: This recipe can be found on the Weight Watchers website. If you’re not a member you can just google it and it should come up for you anyways.

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Slow Cooker Buffalo Chicken (This is actually cooking right now!) This can be found on http://www.emilybites.com

I am nowhere NEAR computer literate, so I did my best to link the photos themselves to their respective sources. So you can try to click on them,  not sure if they will work!

Anyhow, I can vouch for the first two recipes as being DELICIOUS. The third on certainly smells amazing, and I’m not sure how you can go wrong with wing sauce, ranch, and chicken, so it’s probably going to be scrumptious.

I didn’t get to post yesterday for Weigh In Wednesday, but I was down .6! I don’t know how I survived the Thanksgiving Holiday (Even with all the healthy cooking I did, I still consumed my fair share! I even drank close to a bottle of White Zin on Friday night, and stopped for a TEN INCH wawa turkey gobbler…ugh…it’s limited edition, so that’s okay. Right?

Either way, I came out with a LOSS, which is a GAIN of awesome in my book. I am now 191.8 and feeling GREAT. I got in a little work out today with the boy I nanny for, and he even ran with me, some. I was constantly moving for at LEAST one hour today, and we were both drenched in sweat by the time we got to the car.
He’s taking a VERY early nap currently. All that running around really wore him out.

 

 

 

 

How was everyone’s Thanksgiving?

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Skinny Snowman Challenge!

Today is the official start of the Skinny Snowman Challenge from Brooke Not On a Diet! I am so excited to have this motivate me for the next month and stay on track through Christmas. I just printed out my points chart, and I’m working on some of the first challenges.

Here is a link to Brooke’s blog and the Skinny Snowman Challenge for any of you that may want to check it out. The sign up for it is closed, but I’m sure you could still participate for yourselves to stay motivated through the Holidays.

http://brookenotonadiet.wordpress.com/2012/11/15/announcing-my-skinny-snowman-challenge/

I have a walk planned with a friend in a few minutes, I’m sipping on my water, veggies planned for each meal, I will have to go out today to get some fruit since we’re all out, and I’ll write my positives down at the end of the day.

I think the hardest thing for me this week is going to be logging my food. I have been SUPER slacking on tracking with Weight Watchers these last few weeks. I’ve managed to continue to lose weight, but I just can’t seem to actually track. Once I get through this week I think I’ll be back on board with it.

Meatless Mondays will also be a challenge for me, but I’m sure I’ll prevail.

This whole challenge is going to be really awesome because it will force me to try new things, get back into challenging myself, and hopefully by Christmas I’ll be less than I am now :)

Thank you, Brooke, for making this challenge! The last I saw you were at over 100 participants, which is INCREDIBLE. I can’t wait to start working on this challenge with you.

Hard.

Yesterday was rough. Surprisingly though, I did not go crazy eating wise. I was actually ridiculously awesome considering the amount of stress I was under.
As I mentioned in yesterday’s post, I had all three boys I nanny for yesterday. Typically I have the older two for about an hour in the morning, and then it’s just Ben and I for the rest of my ten hour day.
I have dealt with kids of all ages, sizes, backgrounds, and genders. Never have I ever experienced children who behave as badly as these three together do. Adding a third to the mix really makes a difference. And the only time two is ok is when it’s the youngest, Ben, and one of the oldest. Both of the olde boys? Forget it. From the moment their little devil angel eyes open their bickering begins. Who’s getting a shower first? Who got the red bowl? Who has the other ones Spider-Man toy? Who hit who? Etc. It literally goes on and on and on like this until they’re on the bus.
My entire weekend was constantly sprinkled with the reminder to myself I would have all three come Monday, due to Veterans Day. I just had to block it out of my mind completely.
It was about ten times worse than what I had imagined. I’ve never experienced children who listened worse than these three together. It’s literally as if I do not exist to them. When I’m speaking they 100% ignore me. I have to repeat myself AT A MINIMUM of a dozen times before they will finally look at me, and another dozen before they finally move. How my cousin does it every single day I will never know. I guess the power of a mother’s love is really really strong. Really. I broke down around 10am. I quite literally bawled my eyes out to the point that I couldn’t breathe. Thankfully the three of them were busy trying to kill each other in the front yard so they were unaware of my break down.
Rule # 87 in the nanny code: Do whatever it takes to never let a child see you cry, it breaks their hearts and yours.
I just cried and cried. It wasn’t so much their fault as it was a compounding of being in school full time, working full time for very little pay (far less than what I made at my previous job with a not-yet-talking 1 year old), having a house with three dogs and a man who works so very hard to keep the roof over our heads and never feeling like I’m doing ENOUGH (even though Joey reminds me on a daily basis just how much I DO and how thankful he is, I just beat myself up about not being able to help out financially as well as I had been), along with dealing with these three boys. It just broke me yesterday. I couldn’t handle it, and so I cried like a small child. Joey, the amazing man that he is, fixed it all, like usual. He sweetly calmed me down as much as possible over the phone. He has such a way of balancing out my craziness. Once I cried I felt like a hundred bricks had been lifted off my shoulders. I got a clearer head and even got some homework done while the boys were watching a movie, one of them was napping thank goodness.
My day began at 6am and didn’t end until I walked in the door at almost 10pm. Too many of my days are like this and I’m sorry, but I just won’t ever be okay with that.
I have 6ish more months to go and ill be done with school and able to get a big girl job and be finished with nannying once and for all. It may take me through to summer to find one, but I am determined to do so. Being a nanny is the perfect job to do while going to school. If you watch nap-taking aged children it’s even better, because you can focus 100% of your time and energy on them while they’re awake and get your stuff done while they sleep. I’ve thankfully always had the pleasure of nannying for children who sleep, or who at least know how to have quiet time, so I’ve been blessed.
I don’t know how people work regular full time jobs and go to school, it’s exhausting just to do this.
Either way, the point in all of this is that I survived yesterday. I came home and the house was spotless, Joey had waited up for me, and all was good and perfect.
Today I only have two boys, as one is sick and staying home, so it’ll be a good day. At least until 1, when the third comes home from early dismissal.
The great thing about all of this is that I have no homework due this week, at all. I just have to make it to Thursday. And then I can have a relaxing and perfect weekend.

Thursday, Thursday, Thursday.

Is it Thursday yet?

60 pounds, Thanksgiving, and Rowdy Boys

I did it ya’ll! I hit my 60 pounds lost, finally! I can’t tell you all how surprised/relieved/excited I was/still am. It’s really amazing that in just one year and two weeks I managed to lose 60 lbs! I’m less than 30 lbs from WW desired weight, and 13 from my own desired weight. I’m now 193.6 and feeling amazing! I never even believed it was possible to be this low, and never dreamt last year that I would even stick with WW, but look who’s talking now.
I also think I may have had another weight shift, if those even exist. When I first started on this journey, my best friend Brittany, who’s lost over 100 lbs, told me about all the different things to expect. She said there’s going to be times where you’ve experienced a great loss in lbs, and not see a damn bit of difference. And then all of a sudden it’s like your body realizes and sucks itself in and you wake up one morning and its like you’ve changed over night. This has happened a handful of times to me and I gotta tell ya, it’s awesome! Especially when you’re in the beginning stages and really feeling down about not seeing a difference.
My overnight change happened when I woke up Saturday. I was getting ready to go to the grocery store and I grabbed a button up flannel I have that I’ve never ever ever been able to have come close to buttoning up. I was going to wear it over a tank top like I usually do. And it’s like it just was all of a sudden tailored to me and buttoned up with no issue whatsoever. And then I noticed that my whole body had kind of sucked in. Everywhere. It’s always hard to believe when these little shifts happen because they’re almost like an illusion. But when clothes are fitting you easier there is no illusion. When I got home from the store I was feeling a little froggy and decided to try on my bikini. I bought this little polka dotted fifties style bikini when I had lost about 30 lbs, it was a few months to summer and I figured by then it would look good.
It did not. The bottoms come up over your belly button, so you’d think that would be good for some extra suckage, but all that did was cut in at my waist even tighter an my stomach was still hanging over the top.
Then there’s the top of the suit. It my girls were hanging out left and right, bottom, and top. Terrible. I wore it once or twice when summer came, but it was extremely nerve wracking to move around in because I was afraid that any moment my girls were gonna make an appearance. Every move I made was awkward and uncomfortable.
I stuck to a one piece that Brittany had lent me for the majority of the summer and was fine with that.
But Saturday I wanted to see now what it would look like. I nervously reached into my closet for my box of summer items. I sifted though shorts, cover ups, and other miscellaneous summer doodads, and began to see the polka dots peering out at me. It was like ripping off a band aid. I just changed as quickly as possible and looked in the mirror. And holy smokes. HOLY SMOKES. Literally, smoke was radiating off my ridiculously hot bod.
Sike. I’m not that cocky or confident. But my body in that suit has done a 180 since summer. My stomach was flat above the top instead of hanging over, my two now-little friends were covered, and the suit was just gently resting on my waist in stead of cutting into me.
I took about 100 pictures and just laid in my bed admiring them all like a weirdo. I finally realized I was being super creepy and changed once again.
I felt awesome for the rest of the day, and even still today.
The point is that even if you’re not SEEING the fruits of your labor it doesn’t mean they’re not on their way. Your body really does need time to adjust to your weight loss. It’s a bit of a slow poke and if you have the patience it’ll show you what a great job you’re doing. I think that’s one of the biggest reasons people fail on “diets” is because they’re not seeing results fast enough. If only it were a requirement for everyone to join weight watchers. Can you picture how much more room there’d be in the world? I kid, I kid. But really….

In thanksgiving news: Saturdays grocery adventure was for thanksgiving items, among regular stuff. I picked up all kinds if goodies. Here is my menu, it’s pretty traditional as far as thanksgivings go around here.

A 15 lb turkey
An 18$ ham, however many lbs it is
Stuffing (which is the only item on my menu that I just couldn’t skimp on nutritional value. I have only ever made boxed kind, and this will be somewhat more homemade but ill use as many nonfat/light ingredients as possible)
Cranberry sauce. But instead of jellies I bought the whole berry. Nutritional value is identical here, but the whole berry at least provide some fiber.
Green bean casserole. I bought no salt added French cut green beans, fat free cream of mushroom soup, and I will be making my own crunchy onion topping. This dish is pretty okay in it’s regular style BUT the crunchy onions on top are what get you. And I used to use the whole can of fried onions! So this year I set out for a recipe to make my own without frying and I hope it works out.
Fauxtatoes. This one is going to be interesting. It involves cauliflower and cannelloni beans. Ill let you know how it works, but from pictures I’ve seen you can’t tell the difference in looks. Hopefully gravy can cover up any kind of doubts people may have. Gravy works miracles.
I did buy regular ol’gravy, but I just won’t be using as much. Maybe ill get feisty and look up a healthier version. Who knows!
Then there will be no salt added corn.
Sweet potato casserole. This is going to be interesting. This is my fathers favorite dish, so it’s really going to have to be good. He likes it with the brown sugar and marshmallows and all that. Mine isn’t going to have that. Sweet potatoes are SO sweet on their own! I think the recipe I found MAY call for a bit of brown sugar, but just a sprinkling. Then instead of marshmallows, it will be topped with pecans. I’m excited!
Then last, but definitely 100% not least, there’s the desserts. Yea plural.
Pumpkin cheesecake! I made this last year and it was a hit. It’s a recipe I found that involves reduced fat vanilla wafers as the crust, and 1/3 the fat and fat free cream cheese. I believe it’s two fat free and 3 1/3 of the fat packages of cream cheese, and of course natural pumpkin. It’s so good you can’t tell the difference.
And then good old pumpkin pie. I’m using a weight watchers recipe, and I think phyllo dough plays a part in the crust and its definitely way better points wise. Only 4 instead of 10!
I will probably be buying a sugar free apple pie, simply because I’m certainly not a baker whatsoever and I think two pies is enough to send me over the edge as far as my baking skills go.
There will also be breyers fat free ice cream, which if you haven’t tried yet you must! Seriously NOONE knows the difference, I wouldn’t even. It’s that good I swear.

I’m hoping that everything goes off without a hitch. I haven’t quite worked out how I’m going to cook both the turkey and the ham? I only have one oven. But I think if I get the the turkey in soon enough ill have time after its cooked to get the ham done before people arrive. I know the ham is fully cooked but it still has a bit of time to bake.
My mother will be in Florida during the holiday which really sucks and is quadruple lame sauce but whatever. So my dad will be celebrating with us. Joes family is invited but you can’t be too sure with his parents because they typically call on the day of with some reason they can’t make it. I don’t mean to speak badly of them, and truly I’m not, because I’m telling the truth. 9x out of 10 they cancel. And if they do show up they have to leave very early for whatever reason. So it may end up just being Joey, my dad, and myself. My older brother Eric may join us as well. My other two brothers are married and typically spend the holidays with their in laws for the most of it, and since my mom won’t be around it kind of splits everything up. Last year she cooked a week ahead so that she could have everyone together and so that they could all spend time at one place and not have to drive to two different houses for two different dinners with all the kids. But this year I don’t think she’s doing that.
I hope joeys parents do make it because he’s been talking a lot recently about how his whole family used to get together a lot for dinners and that sort of things and he misses it, naturally. I hoped that by volunteering to host that it would take the burden, financially, off of them from having to worry about it and that we could just all enjoy each others company. So cross your fingers everyone!

This post is getting extremely lengthy but I have more thing to talk about.
Yesterday Joey had some friends over, which meant me compulsively cleaning every inch of the house. I even moved our entire bed and vacuumed under there, I dusted the LEGS of our end tables, and steam cleaned all the carpet. Which is our whole house. He could not understand why I was so intent about cleaning things that noone would even see, but it’s the only way I can feel comfortable about having people over. Our house is pretty much always tidy and ready for visitors, but when there’s multiple people over I just feel like that’s more eyes to catch whatever things we have literally swept under the rug.
Along with doing all of that cleaning I also managed to lay out a pretty sweet spread of food. With joeys help of course. Together we accomplished a 3 lb beef brisket slow cooked for 8 hours, which turned out to be incredibly amazing. Two pizzas. HOMEMADE. Joey makes the BESt pizza. It’s whole wheat dough, fat free mozzarella, a tomato sauce, and turkey pepperoni. It always tastes so much better than delivery or digiorno, and I’m just not saying that because I love the cook! Pizza always turns my stomach these days, whether its from all the grease or the cheese I’m not sure. But his pizza is to die! I also made a five layer dip with fat free refried beans, fat free sour cream, weight watchers Mexican cheese, salsa, and wholey guacamole. This was so yum! There was also a cheese as turkey pepperoni tray with crackers. A lot of people showed up and it was really awesome to just have a bunch of our friends over. There was an eagles/Dallas game on, and joeys a Dallas fan all the way, so it was interesting to hear all the shouting but this time from two sides.
Everyone loved the food and noone even knew it was better for you!

Okay I really can’t go on anymore. I’m sitting at work waiting on the boys to wake up, while hoping they stay asleep all day since they have off from school. It’s going to be an awful nightmare with all three today. I’m honestly getting sick to my stomach even thinking about it.
Wish me luck?

Skinny Wishes Wednesday

Today is the first Wednesday back to weighing in since my .6 gain. I have 1 pound to lose to hit 60 lost and I’m really hoping I hit it today. I was good all week long and drank copious amounts of water. I will admit that I did not track at all, but I was extremely conscious of what I ate. We went out to eat Saturday and Sunday, Mexican and Sushi, however I didn’t even come close to eating the amount of sushi I normally do. I think I had two rolls, and two cups of miso soup. I did of course have some shrimp fried rice, but seriously compared to what I usually inhale when we have sushi I ate like a mouse. And for Mexican, I’m pretty sure that was the first time I didn’t have a margarita with my shrimp quesadilla! I love this Mexican place we go to. It’s SO fresh, my quesadilla isn’t drenched in grease and oil, and it’s just filled with vegetables and shrimp. It’s not caked in cheese and gunk. I also like how all the sour cream and guacamole is on the side so I can add it if I choose.
Every other night we cooked and had leftovers for lunch. I know I should’ve tracked but I was honestly just lazy about it.
What stinks is because I didn’t track, I can’t be sure of what my weigh in will be.
I did run 4 times this passed week which is phenomenal. I’m very hopeful today, but you never know.
I’m afraid of where a gain will set me in terms of my thought process. I so easily let it get me down its insane. I don’t even know why at this point because I know what to do to NOT gain and I know how to lose. I know I only need 14 more pounds until my personal goal weight is reached, 30 more for weight watchers appointed goal, so I’m not longer 90 pounds away and it’s a lot less daunting, but it doesn’t mean I have more room to fuck up.
So send me your skinny wishes for today if you read this before 9am eastern time!

In other news, OBAMA WON!
That’s really all I’m going to say about that since I’m not extremely political; however, I do appreciate good character, morals, and being able to trust someone. Mitt Romney just seems like a giant tool shed and that’s not who I want helping to run this country.
End digression.

Hope you all had a fantastic week. Ill update soon regarding my weigh in!

It’s all Worth it

All the pointing, tracking, worrying, monthly payments, admittedly-sometimes-depriving, guilt trips, frustration, anger, fear, and resentment at times is all worth it. Finally. For the last year I have struggled so many times. I’ve faltered on numerous occasions. I have made dozens of excuses, and a handful of empty promises to myself. But through all of that I did it! I succeeded in losing most weeks, I became a runner for the first time in my life, I’ve gone from a size 18-20 to a 10-12. Even with ALL of the self doubt and the surety that I was NOT progressing, it happened.
We had our engagement shoot yesterday. And for anyone that may know me, you know that the one thing I fear more than Oompa Loompas is having my picture taken. I despise it really. Unless of course I’m taking it myself at the absolutely right angle with all of the photoshopping and filters a y disposal. So naturally I was truly nervous about how this would turn out. I had wanted to wait for the spring to have these taken so that I’d have time to lose more weight. But our wedding is in Autumn, and the leaves are so gorgeous right now that I knew the engagement shoot had to be in Autumn too, and plus I could cover up unlike with a spring session.
I made the make up appointment, made sure Joey had a decent outfit picked out, got pumpkins, a new leash and collar for Bobbie (obviously our baby had to be in a few!), and Joey even carved a heart into one of the pumpkins. I fretted over what kind of paint to get for the pumpkins, literally working myself into a nervous sweat. I agonized over whether or not I should wear gloves because I didn’t know if it would look like I had fat hands or not if I did wear them. It was a nightmare. I threatened to call it off at least twice the day of. I really hate having my picture taken!
We headed up to Ridley Creek State Park in Pennsylvania, which is absolutely frickin gorgeous by the way. There’s this FABULOUS stone mansion there and it has the best landscape ever. I’d never been there before but I trusted our amazing photographer and was totally excited…for the scenery. We got there pretty early so we could let the dog chase around the leaves and pine cones, and so that I could paint the numbers of our wedding date on the pumpkins (9 20). I even ran around some to warm up because it was FREEZING. I practiced my smile 100 times in any reflection I could find, and then Ron showed up. I kept nervously laughing at everything and then it began. First he started shooting the pumpkins, which I was happy to let him take a million of so as long as it meant I had more time to prepare myself. And then it was our turn. I wasn’t sure if my bangs were crooked or if my double chin was showing. I kept laughing like a crazy person. I thought my calves were too big. I literally was going over every ridiculous detail of my body over and over again.
We started walking around the place and Ron would tell us to do certain poses, and we would. And then wed also be our silly normal selves and start laughing when he’d say “Now Joey look into her eyes”. At one point Ron even told us that the best photos so far were when we were just doing our own thing, and for the rest of the time he pretty much just let us do what we wanted which I loved.
He let us know after it was over that he’d post a few photos in a few day and he’d have the rest in about two weeks. And then this morning I had three requests to be tagged in photos of Ron’s. I couldn’t look at them for at least an hour. Finally around 5:30am I got up the courage to face them.
I was blown away. Two out of the three actually had our faces in them, the other one had our hands and the heart carved pumpkin. The two photos with our faces just absolutely floored me. Not because I thought I looked earth shatteringly gorgeous or anything, which lets just face it I did lol, but because I didn’t hate them! I really really loved them. I couldn’t believe it.
From the beginning of this whole engagement and wedding planning I’ve been dreading photos. I was convinced I’d hate these and if I hated these I’d hate my wedding photos and itd all be for nothing. And not because I don’t trust our photographer but just because I’ve never ever ever liked a photo of me, at least not in the last 6 years. Which was when I started putting on weight.
Now that I love this little sneak preview so much I know I will love the rest, and I no longer am afraid of our wedding photos! I am so excited!

Here’s a little preview for you guys:

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Everything was worth it for these pictures. Not only are these some of the most important photos of my life, but they’re 100x more enjoyable because they’re with the man I get to marry and the fact that I want to show them to the world is amazing. He will love any photo of us ever, and any photo of me is a masterpiece in his eyes. Even ones where my eyes are half open and I’ve got a mouthful of food, I know he thinks I’m gorgeous. I wanted to love these so much for him and it added more pressure on me because I knew if I didn’t like what I looked like then noone could see them and that’s just selfish of me because I knew he’d want to. We have a few photos of us hanging in our house now and they’re from when we first started dating. They’re mostly all from this one day when we were trapped in a snow storm in his little apartment. My mom has every picture from that day because she uploaded them to her laptop like a little sneaker! (She’s done that ever since I’ve owned a camera and will surprise me with them at the most embarrassing moments…like in a slideshow at my college graduation party) anyways, I love those pictures of us because they just captured how in love we were and how new we were. I didn’t care what angle they were taken from or how stupid we looked. They weren’t meant to be gorgeous.
These photos were. But they still capture just how in love we are and how much we care about each other. Can you even tell how nervous I am, or that I’m thinking about how bad they would be? Probably not because once he started snapping away all of my worries kind of dissipated. Because Joey was there whispering silly thing between shots like “You look like you have a finger in your butt” and “How mad do you think Bobbie is right now that she’s locked in the car?” And “I hope that kid falls in the fountain”. I knew he was just trying to ease my nerves and make me feel better.
I can’t wait to marry him!

Don’t Ask Why

Remember last week when I said that I was gonna push start myself into being perfect get back on track? Yea. That didn’t happen, at all. I started faltering quite early on, and by the time Hurricane Sandy was nearing? There was no way her wind could pick my large ass up! I mean it. I honestly just kept eating, and eating, and eating. Let me take you on my Hansel and Gretyl trail.
Wednesday: Joey took me to dinner at Famous Dave’s. that’s all I have to say about that.
Thursday: I’m pretty sure I ate a decent sized steak and almost an entire prepared box of au gratin potatoes. Yup.
Friday: (supposed to be my stress echo day and they canceled it. So that’s awesome) I picked up my friend Lauren who was staying with me for the weekend and she was hungry, so naturally we grabbed chik-fil-a, something I haven’t freakin had in almost two years! Ugh. So good though. Then that night we got sushi, and I binged hard.
Saturday (my birthday): I was pretty good with breakfast. I really don’t remember much of lunch time, seeing as how we didnt leave the house until 3. (I think I got a 7g of fat or less hoagie from Wawa and some baked chips. Don’t quote me on that). When we got back from running Girly errands and shopping for Halloween costumes Joey greeted us with a full banana cream pie cheesecake from The Cheesecake Factory. Ugh. I knew he was going to get cheesecake, and I specifically asked him to please just get me a SLICE. Whoops! So I had a slice of that. Then we went out to the bar and I had a couple beers, some wings, some fries, some chocolate cake, some nachos, some mozzarella sticks. I mean WTF! Then came back home and ate another slice of cheesecake.
Sunday: ugh. Can I stop now? We took Lauren back to the airport in Philly and we HAD to get her a Philly cheesesteak, because you can’t come to Philly and NOT get one. So of course we all had one. Once we got back home we cleaned and prepared for the storm. We had a plan to head to my parents the following day so we went shopping for different things like water and regular stuff. I didn’t want to stock up on canned goods incase it wasn’t a natural disaster, and nothing good comes in a can. (I realized during this preparation that it would totally suck for a ww member to have to live during a Zombie apocalypse). Once we got back from shopping we packed our stuff up and i decided to be a good WW member and make a HUGE pot of Turkey Bean and Vegetable Chili.

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So delicious, btw, and only 5 points. I’ve made it a few times. You can find it on the WW website.
Now. I made this so that wed have something healthy to eat at my parents.
So obviously I wasn’t going to eat it that night for dinner…but I should have. For dinner we ordered Chinese food! Please punch me now. All you need to know is I ate EVERYTHING I ORDERED, which I don’t think has ever happened. I’m pretty sure I passed out in a food coma later.

Monday: You thought Saturday was bad? Then you’ve never been to my parents house. Where my mom lives. Holy crap. I ate two, maybe three bowls of chili. Then my mom decided to make dinner. Why? Who effing knows. She made. A GIGANTIC pot of noodles. Like army size big. And her delicious sausage and fat filled spaghetti sauce that she knows I cannot resist. I had three bowls of that too. Oh, and remember the chocolate cake from Saturday? I had three slices. Plus whatever snacks I could find. I literally had to put myself to bed that night just so I would stop gorging my self.

Then Tuesday came. Sweet, glorious, wonderful Tuesday. By this point I’m sure you all can imagine that I did NOT have any plans of going to WW the next day so I could have just kept on eating. But something woke me up on Tuesday. And the eating stopped. My mom made her famous larger than life breakfast. Pancakes, scrapple, sausage, eggs, and who else knows because I DIDN’T EAT IT! She was highly annoyed at me for doing this and referred to me as “Eric”, my older brother who lives with them and literally goes out of his way NOT to eat what she cooks and instead will make or order something else EVERY DAY. He’s an asshole. I was just trying not to be fat. I had packed myself cream of wheat and decided to Have that with some fat free milk. It was delicious!
Later on we headed back home, because oh btw Sandy didn’t really affect us. We got home to find that everything was fine and the power never went out. We started unpacking and took out chicken breasts for dinner. While I was being lazy watching TV Joey came in and said he was “bored” and that he wanted to go to the gym. I immediately wanted to hide my face in shame. Hearing about the gym just makes me want to crawl up in to a little ball. I HATE the gym. But it kick started me. Once he called and found out they were open we geared up and headed over. I ran a decent 5k (I haven’t run in WEEKS so I was surprised at myself, and no chest pain!) Once we got back I made some grilled chicken sandwiches with broccoli and tomato soup on the side. Perfection :)
And yesterday continued with more perfection as far as eating. I even ran 3.5 miles after work. We had plans to see the band Foxy Shazam at the TLA in Philly which I was honestly a little worried about. But! I cooked some unbelievably delicious pork chops before we left and I packed a clif bar and some crackers for snacks. At the TLA all I had was a diet coke. We even had to pass a dozen cheesesteak shops. But we prevailed! When we got home around 11:30 I was hungry but I just had about 2oz of some ham and went to bed.
Today I will be resting from running as my legs and lower back are extremely sore. I have work and class today so there wouldn’t be much room anyhow.
I feel like my booty is OFFICIALLY back in gear and I’m ready to tackle this weekend and have a great weigh in next Wednesday!
Hope you all faired well in the wrath if Sandy and with food. :)

Side note: Sandy did affect hundreds of other families across the eastern coast. Especially in New York and parts of Southern Delaware (we live in Northern DE) many people lost their homes, beach houses, pets, loved ones, cars, and countless other precious items. Thank goodness it was only a Category 1 and that it turned into a Tropical Storm after it made land fall. My heart goes out to anyone who may have been affected and I hope you can recover at least some of your losses. My heart especially goes out to those who may have lost their lives or any pets. I can’t imagine the pain you may be experiencing and I send my condolences.

+ 0.6

UGH! All I needed to do was lose .4 and I GAINED .6! Wtf! Now I have a whole pound to go before hitting 60 :( . This weekend is my birthday, so seeing 60 lbs lost probably won’t have a chance next week. My friend is flying in tomorrow, so I most likely wont be running this weekend. And my eating def won’t be fantastic. Especially since last night Joey took me out to an early birthday dinner and I ate SO terribly. First we sat around for about 2 hours before picking Famous Dave’s. I know, I know. But I just can’t resist some good BBQ! I ordered what I always order, the two meat combo, and managed to eat the ENTIRE thing (sans the bread), which I don’t think I’ve ever done! I then made Joey stop for Dairy Queen (bad idea number 2) and got a medium banana cream pie blizzard. So delicious! However, I immediately regretted it upon opening my eyes this morning. I’m gonna be completely on track all day today, and shoot for being on plan tomorrow.
I plan on running tomorrow morning. Joey and I both have off and I have the stress test (for my chest pain) at the cardiologist at 11, then picking up my Halloween costume at noon, and then will leave for the airport around 2:30. I PLAN on waking up by 7, running a good 4-5 miles, then showering and going for my test. A good run always motivates me to stay on track.
Then Saturday (my birthday!) I will try to squeeze in a short run, I’m not sure how long my friend will sleep in or if she does at all, so if I can run before she wakes up that would be good. Then I will stay on plan for the day, and enjoy my birthday that night! My parents are bringing cake to the bar that Joeys show is at and I’ve invited a few friends, so it should be a decent time. And since ill be around a ton of people, ill probably stick to one slice, especially since I’m not a huge cake eater. Then Sunday is when my friend leaves, so we will take her to the airport in the afternoon, and go clothes shopping!
I really am going to do my best to stay on plan this weekend, and I truly hope I can. I so do not want to gain next week. I figure if I squeeze in my runs I will be fine, and ill try to run again Monday night after class, although it will be 9pm! Perhaps I can sneak it in between 330 and 5 which is the time between getting off work and having to leave for class. I just need to plan!
Hell, I may even run tonight after class!
I feel so disgusting today. I was literally shoveling food in my mouth last night and it was the first time I’ve been able to eat without feeling guilty while eating. But my guilt is surely making up for the lack of it last night!
I will try to stick to salads this weekend and lots of veggies and fruit and water water water!
I obviously need a ton of motivation this weekend guys so please send all your lucky vibes my way! It can be your birthday present to me ;)
Have a good weekend ya’ll!

Only .4

All I need today is to lose a measly .4! So what do I do last night? Stuff my face with low fat cheese and reduced fat crackers, and a few spoonfuls of full on fatty fat fat chocolate brownie ice cream. What the fuck?
In my defense dinner turned out TERRIBLY. I decided to try a pork chop marinade consisting of angry orchard hard cider, garlic, salt and pepper. In theory, it should have been delicious. In reality it was a full on failure. The dogs liked it at least! I also stuffed my face with Brussels sprouts if that counts for anything.
Not feeling like cooking another meal we just reached for our cheese and crackers and had a cathartic hour of going through our day and the future.
My birthday is this week and my good friend Lauren, from North Carolina, is coming to visit me! I haven’t seen her since I moved in 2009! (I lived in Wilmington, NC for two years in 2007-2009.) I am so excited she is coming! Joey has a show on my birthday, which kind of sucks, but at least we will be at the bar around our friends. My parents will be bringing a cake and ringing in the big 24 with me :).
Joey and I also got on the topic of what he was going to be getting me for my birthday. Now, let me preface this by saying he is a TRUE man when it comes to buying gifts. Unless its explicitly written out for him, he blanks. Which is fine! But unless I specifically say what I need and where to find it, he’s lost. However, for my graduation present he did pick out a gorgeous Michael Kors watch all on his own :). So, this year, since I haven’t laid out a blue print of ideas he blanked. And he honestly thought handing me a literal bag of money was going to suffice.
You may think “what kind of girl doesn’t want a bag of money!?!?” I think what I enjoy most on my birthday gift-wise, is the thought. I like to picture him out in the mall looking around, or remembering something I may have said I liked a while ago…but that’s all for the movies! (Now I have had boyfriends who shopped this way, but they lacked in just about every single department.) So when he said he was thinking of giving me a bag of money I Almost choked on a brownie piece. I REALLY thought he was kidding, but by the complete confusion on his sweet face as to why I wouldn’t be jumping for joy at a bag of money kind of leads me to believe he truly thought it was a great idea. So I made a deal with him. I told him to keep his bag of money, and he can instead take me shopping for new clothes. I’m happily too small for almost everything I own right now, and this way Joey can help me pick out some new duds and were all happy!
I figured I’ve got everything I could possibly want. He freakin asked me to marry him this year and handed over a GORGEOUS rock, so honestly what more can I ask for? Apparently new clothes haha. Either way, bags full of clothes to me are always better than a bag full of money.

Ill be updating again today I’m sure after weigh in. Wish me luck on that .4 to get me to 60 lbs lost!

Weigh in Day!?

Nervousness is really setting in today. I usually wake up excited on my Weigh in Days. The last 3, including today, I have been scared of the scales. I’m afraid that they’re going to ruin my day. I’m petrified I’m going to be above 200 again. One would think that that fear would drive me to do better and to stay on track. In my case it seems to have done the opposite.
I finished my day yesterday pretty well. I took two clementines and a 0% fat strawberry fage Greek yogurt to class with me, plus filled my big cup of water there twice. Joey brought home and had a salad works salad waiting for me. It was a create your own salad consisting of egg whites, grilled chicken, ham, little avocado, sundries tomato, tomato, and obviously mixed greens. I had light ranch for dressing, and I did eat part of my wheat roll that came with it, the other half went to Bobbie. I topped off the night with something I typically don’t do nights before weigh in and had some fat free chocolate ice cream with fat free and sugar free caramel syrup, and walnuts. It was a perfect ending to a long day.

Something that really freaked me out yesterday was that I had 3 sharp chest pains again. When this chest pain began 3 weeks ago it started after I had this shocking pain in my upper left chest. I’ve had these pains in the past since I was a teenager. I used to associate them with drinking too many mountain dews, or eating too much salt. When I began weight watchers and started working out they went away for the most part. I may have had one the entire 11 months on weight watchers. Then 3 weeks ago one came on STRONG, and left that residual pain that subsided after two weeks. Then two days ago I had another, this time the pain did not reside. Yesterday it happened in the morning, then while I was in class, and again on my drive home from class while I was on the phone with my mom. The third time I just broke down into tears. I may have been slightly dramatic but I said “If I drop dead suddenly PLEASE make sure they perform an autopsy and make them figure out what the fuck is happening!” She calmed me down and told me that if I’m really scared I need to stop googling my diagnoses and go see a real specialist. Before I spoke with her I did leave a voicemail at a pulmonary doctors office, but since I’m a new patient I will have to wait two business days to hear back. We shall see.
It’s not like I WANT something to be wrong. And who knows, these chest shocks could all just be precordial catch syndrome something thats very common. Who knows! Hopefully the doctors call back ASAP for an appointment.

……
I got kind of sidetracked in the middle of writing this post due to getting the boys I watch ready for picture day at school and sending them off on the bus. In that time I also went to my weight watchers meeting! Doesn’t that little ! Always give it away?

I’m officially .4 away from hitting 60 pounds lost! I always love when I have a teeny goal to hit for the next week. It makes it so much more relaxing and easier to hit. Who knows what I’ll be sayin next Tuesday though. ;)

Today is also my 1 year anniversary on Weight Watchers, can you believe that? It’s been an entire year and I’ve stuck with it! I never quit, I never gave up. Sure, I had my lazy moments and my lazy days/weeks/months!!! But I never strayed completely. My meeting leader asked me today if my recent bump in weight loss is due to my impending wedding, and I had to answer truthfully. I don’t think it is. Sure, it’s in the back of my mind, but typically I’m a gigantic procrastinator so something being practically a year away does not get me worried until its about 3 months away. I’m sure I will hit a few hiccups along the way, and I will probably run into another plateau but I just have to run around it, literally. The pounds seem to be melting off right now, and I’m loving it! But I know that’s just a sign that it will stop falling off as quickly eventually. We shall see how this bumpy ride goes!

Happy Anniversary to WW and I!

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